My Husband’s Daughter Thinks I Married Him for His Money, So I Revealed a Family Secret that Shocked Her
Cold stares have cast a shadow over one woman’s family gatherings. Her husband’s daughter always thought she married her father for the money. Little did she know, there was a family secret that could change everything she thought she knew.
She explained what happened.
I’ve (38F) been married to my husband Rob (52M) for four years now. Rob’s late wife passed away a year before we met, and we dated for two years before tying the knot. He has two children, 28-year-old Madison and 26-year-old Brett. They’ve made it clear that I’m not their stepmom, just their dad’s wife, which is fine since I didn’t play a part in raising them.
Our relationship has always been strained. Despite my efforts to be kind and generous, they remain distant. As a child of divorce, I understand the difficulty of seeing a parent move on, so I try not to push things.
Recently, Madison got engaged, and we were all thrilled for her. During a family gathering, she asked about the wedding budget, and Rob offered to contribute $10k. Madison was upset, hoping for more, but Rob is still recovering financially. Before his late wife passed, he spent his savings, cashed out his 401k, and took a second mortgage on his house to cover medical and living expenses, as he had to cut back on work. Eventually, he switched to a lower-paying but more flexible job. So, $10k is quite generous from him.
When Rob stepped out to run an errand, Madison asked if I would contribute more. I explained that as a marital unit, we agreed on $10k as a reasonable contribution. She then accused me of marrying her father for his money. This was the rudest thing she had ever said to me, and I lost my temper. I revealed that I have been paying the second mortgage her dad took out to pay his debts.
The truth is, I earn significantly more than Rob, have no debt, and have been covering 70% of our household expenses since we got married. The $10k we’re giving her is possible because I’ve been subsidizing her father’s living expenses. I wanted her to know that not only am I not a gold digger, but I’m also financially better off than my “older husband.”
Madison called me stuck up and stormed out. Later, she called Rob, claiming I blamed her mother’s illness for the budget constraints. I explained what really happened, and while Rob was angry with her, he also said I shouldn’t have disclosed his financial details to his kids.
People stood by her side.
- “You are not wrong, but you have to know that you’re either stuck up or a gold digger to a child (even an adult one) who has determined to make you a wicked stepmother.” Petefriend86 / Reddit
- “It’s important that she and her sibling understand his financial standing. Not to be a downer, but eventually, if he passes (hopefully not for a long time), you don’t want to be facing accusations that you’ve robbed an inheritance.” LouisianaGothic / Reddit
- “They were his late wife’s medical debts. It’s not like he has anything to be ashamed of. I’m assuming she had a long illness, and he was a caretaker for a long time. It takes a toll.
I see no reason to keep it from his kids, and he’d be a jerk to let them believe you’re a money drain on your marriage when it’s the kids’ mother’s medical care doing it.” th987 / Reddit
- “Your husband needs to have stern words with his kids. If he doesn’t have a word about calling you a gold digger and then spouting lies, you may need to consider whether he actually loves and respects you. Perhaps he’s the gold digger!!” Tasty_Doughnut_9226 / Reddit
- “The kids are grown-ups, and now they need to start adulting. She is lucky she got that offer from her dad. Why do these kids act so entitled? UGH.” banjadev / Reddit
- “He’d rather have his kids say you are a gold digger than tell them the truth. They aren’t your kids, don’t contribute a dime to the wedding.” ArsenalSeven / Reddit
Building a blended family is never easy, but we need to remain committed to fostering understanding and respect, hoping that one day, we can move past these tensions and truly become a united family.
